Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie to make rose by other name

I don’t know what it’s like to be Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, but I imagine there are enjoyable moments.

Though they seem to have more children than the average McDonald’s, they still find time to get involved on all sorts of wonderful projects.

Pitt is well-known for his fascination with architecture. Jolie, on the other hand, has a real-life role as the love-child of Boutros Boutros Ghali and Mother Teresa.

How odd, then, that their latest excursion into culture seems so relatively frivolous.

For they intend to make wine. What’s most odd, as Bloomberg reports, is that this wine isn’t even an original.

In its first incarnation, it was called “Pink Floyd.” Which, one supposes was intended to walk the line between cool and humorous. (Now, it is being given the very serious name Miraval, after the chateau where its grapes are curated.)

What’s even more odd is the new Pitt-Jolie grape juice is, as its former name tried to suggest, a rose.

Somehow, pink wine is often seen as frivolous — rather like Hollywood stars.

Imaginative apologists might offer that their first wine had to be pink in order to reflect the true perfection of their union.

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They might say that when you mix the red that represents Jolie’s fiery lips and personality with the white redolent of Pitt’s paler, more relaxed being you get pink.

Some, though, might have questions when they hear more of the details.

For example, their names will be on the bottle, but will be presented as “Jolie-Pitt.” Yes, not “Pitt-Jolie”, not “Pitt and Jolie.” Not even “a Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie production.”

Again, imaginative apologists will declare that this merely suggests that even the pits in their chosen grapes will have been chosen for their inner happiness.

Once you have considered further this venture into Jolie-de-Vivre, please consider these words, uttered to Bloomberg by Marc Perrin, the winemaker helping them create their rose spectacle.

He said: “If you knew Brad and Angelina, you would see they are in search of perfection in everything.”

The search for perfection — especially in everything — can often be painful. Along the way, one encounters so much imperfection that it alter one’s mind and body irrevocably.

Then there’s what a lawyer might term as evidence.

Pitt and Jolie’s search for perfection has involved stops at “Meet Joe Black,” “Tales From The Crypt,” “Salt” and even “Cyborg 2.”

These might be considered as being on a par with E&J Gallo’s very fine double act of “Night Train Express” and Ripple.”

Naturally, you’ll be wondering only what adjectives those behind the wine have chosen to describe it.

Well, the Miraval’s tasting experience comprises “floral, wild lily aromas and brighter flavor notes of strawberry and raspberry.”

So not unlike a perfume that might be endorsed by La Jolie herself.

I’ve struggled trying to find how much a bottle of this fine concoction might cost or whether those who struggle with mere mortality will be able to buy it.

But please imagine how many people will attempt to claim, in the very near future, that they had Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie at their dinner table.

I have, though, enormous respect for the relative restraint of the marketers.

At least they didn’t stoop to the ruse attempted by a German company that insists its spirits are poured down a model’s breasts before being bottled.

 

 

Image E Entertainment/YouTube Screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk

 

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